How do you tell when it's been a while since you've been on a certain site? When you can't remember the password to the site.
This has been a very busy month. A wedding, a funeral, rehab, powerschool,.....but enough of that. What shall we talk about?
I can't remember how old I was, but I was able to sit on my grandmothers lap. We were attending a funeral and I was voicing my opinion on my mandatory attendance of a function where I wasn't socially related to the guest of honor. In fact, the deceased wasn't even directly related.
I quickly found out that my opinion should never be spoken aloud. Not while an elder still had the ability to "lay" hands on me. I also had the opportunity to hear my grandmother say something that has stayed with me up to this day. She said that we're not here for the dead. The dead doesn't care if we show up to these things. We're here for the living. All these people around us noticed that we showed up. It's out of respect for the living people that we attend, not the dead.
It may not seem like much but that exchange has gone a long way to affect my perspective on things. There are many ways to see a situation. Is graduation for the graduate, or is it for all those who have invested into the student? Is a wedding for the bride and groom, or is it for the friends and family that saw the inevitability of a union?
3 comments:
Grandmothers are the best philosophers. As the old folk song goes, "I don't mind dyin', but I hate to see my children cryin'."
I agree, but I gotta say the wedding is definitely for the bride and groom. It would be the same for them, no matter who showed up. It is the start of a journey, and that journey will not changed based on who shows up at the starting line, but based on what the two participants put into the journey. Anyway, that's my two cents. But your grandma sounds like a very wise woman.
There was a point in my life that I only attended funerals...I didn't bother with the joyful celebrations.I felt obligated to attend the funerals. Then, I had a shift (a healthy one, for sure!). I realized that life is about showing up for the funerals, the weddings, AND the birthdays. It's not only about the honorees. It's not only about the audience. It's about our clan and our culture! The tears and the laughter binds us all together!
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